You never know what will be the last thing you say to someone. On a transport ship leaving earth, a passenger kills time by scrolling through the messages of their social media feed. As the ship leaves and moves further and further away from home, the delay between sending messages and their arrival lengthens. What feels like minutes on the ship is hours, days, weeks, even years back on Earth. Each refresh of the timeline is a tiny window into the past. What will you do in those precious few moments as the lives of everyone you know pass by?

"azathoth.js, the latest cutting edge tool from Neddy Ar-Lathotep, was released today under an Elder Source License. Users were disturbed to find that they had already been using the insidious framework for as long as they remember, something Ar-Lathotep described as "perfectly normal". "You've never been what you thought you were," he told this reporter from just over their shoulder when they thought they were alone. "This will make you more what you are." The tool includes out of the box options for letting hideous things out of a box, with support for shims, shivs and shoggoths. The framework comes less than a year after Ar-Lathotep's last project, cthulthu.js, turned out to contain a timing issue that meant that threads were not dead when they eternal lie. Ar-Lathotep claims that the failure of cthulhu.js was because "the stars were not yet right", something that azathoth.js transcends through its extra-cosmic nature. Our developers have been testing the capabilities of the new framework since it was released, and we'll let you know their thoughts as soon as we can find their heads. We know they're still alive, we can hear them screaming. In the meantime, we'd suggest that if your screen starts to bleed you close your browser immediately."